Eight Goodbyes Read online

  Simon stood in the living room of Tessa’s suite, staring out at the wide expanse of the sky with his hands in his pockets and a carry-on at his side.

  Andrew had left. Still, Simon debated whether he should get his own room. He realized it was not something he wanted to do despite how he felt.

  It had taken quite the maneuver to get here. He’d been asked to travel to Asia many times, and his supervisors were shocked when he’d finally agreed to schedule a trip to visit one of the research facilities in Kowloon. But since no one knew about Tessa, no one suspected his motives. To them, it was a blessing they’d be smart to take advantage of.

  There he was, scheduled for a tour of the facility on Monday. But for now, he had three days to spend with Tessa. Their friendship had continued to develop after San Francisco. Somehow, it had become easier, freer, less constrained. They traded messages at any time of the day and night. They became experts at calculating the time difference. His WhatsApp profile would register his regular checks at 3 a.m. Chicago time and she would always reply to his messages at 3 p.m. his time.

  And he continued his crazy life in London, putting in even more hours at work than he’d originally anticipated. He even made an effort to check in on Maxine. He found that there’d been no devastation on either side, just a bit of wounded pride on her part. Nothing that trips with her friends wouldn’t cure with time.

  No one in his family knew what was going on.

  His parents had no opinion about what he was doing with his life. He’d always kept them close, filled them with pride for his accomplishments. They trusted that he knew what he was doing. You can’t force love, they told him. Love isn’t like the atoms you work with to manipulate surfaces and things, love just happens. And when it does, there’s no guarantee that it’s forever. And then his dad would follow it up by looking lovingly into his mother’s eyes and mumble, “We’re just lucky it’s this way for your mum and I.”

  Not even Adrian was aware he was flying between continents to meet a friend. He didn’t feel the need to explain these business trips. Even his logical mind had decided to bypass its propensity to explain everything. For the first time in his life, he was winging it.

  But that day was not the day to wing it. He had caught Tessa by surprise by taking an earlier flight and arriving in Hong Kong sooner. And apparently, the man in her room as well. The same model she’d been with in Vegas. Simon’s insecurities about their keeping silent about their life outside of each other began to surface. It wasn’t her problem that he was too busy with work to screw anyone else. More power to her. If she had the time, that was great.

  Fuck that.

  Who was he kidding? He’d even stopped googling her after he’d seen her in San Francisco. He was afraid of what he would find, what he might discover. He didn’t want to lose her to his jealousy, didn’t want to pressure her so much it would scare her away. He was going to go with the flow for as long as he could.

  He didn’t even hear her when she finally leaned against his back and slipped her arms through his. There was something about her smell that drove him crazy. It was a personally crafted mix from a parfumerie in Paris.

  She stood on her toes and leaned her forehead on his shoulder. Slowly, he turned around, enclosing her in his arms. He caught sight of little piles around the room. Clothes, books, a laptop, notebooks. He made a mental note to clean up when she wasn’t looking.

  “Are you mad?” Tessa asked, her brown eyes shielded by her dark, thick eyelashes.

  “Seriously? Second cousin?” he asked in jest. He enjoyed watching her squirm over the introduction. She was so transparent; her face betrayed every single lie she’d ever tell. And every single truth. He wished he had taken a picture of her then. She had turned red with embarrassment. Definitely a Snapchat moment.

  “I know!” she exclaimed. “Sorry!” She released her hold on him and covered her face with her hands.

  “We don’t look alike so I couldn’t say we were first cousins, and then the word second just slipped out of my mouth!” she said, stepping backward and resting on the couch’s arm.

  “Crazy flackery mumbo jumbo.”

  “I’m supposed to know what you just said, right?” she laughed, twinkling eyes like the stars. He wondered whether they had something to do with his sudden shortness of breath.

  “I’ve been subscribing to a dictionary since I met you.”

  “Stop.” She placed her palms flat on his chest.

  “Would it really be a big deal if he found out about me?” He stepped in.

  “Yes! It would be! The press is playing off Andrew’s and my supposed attraction to each other,” she said.

  “Supposed attraction?” he asked, gently pushing her down so only the bottom half of her body remained elevated.

  “Oh my god. Really, Simon?” She frowned. “That’s all work! You know how he gets on my nerves.”

  “And this? What is this?” Simon asked, kissing her again and again. She opened her mouth up and gave him access to what he’d been wanting since he walked in the door.

  “Play.” She giggled.

  Simon stepped between her legs as she wrapped them around him. Gently, he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “You look different. Beautiful as always, but something’s different.”

  “I’m growing my bangs out. Look.” She parted her hair sideways with the tips of her fingers.

  “And I can’t see your pretty ears anymore,” he whispered, leaning down to kiss her again. She pulled his head down and met his kiss. Every time he touched a part of her, it always felt like the first time. She remained new, shiny, breakable. The moments they spent together after being apart were always intense.

  “Simon?” she muttered against his lips.

  “Hmm,” he answered, still kissing her, tugging at her top lip with his teeth. He didn’t like it when she pulled away.

  “I was happy when you told me you broke up with Maxine,” she said, caressing his hair as he nuzzled her neck.

  “Good. So was I.”

  Tessa squealed as he lifted her roughly, intent on taking her to the bedroom. He went from door to door, opening a closet, and then the pantry, and then the guest bathroom. And not without tripping over a pair of high heels in the hallway.

  “Jesus!” he growled. “If we don’t find the bed soon I’m going to take you right here!”

  She giggled, pressed herself against his hardness and pointed straight ahead of her. “There.”

  He kicked the door open and laid her flat on the bed while kneeling directly in front of her. He almost shredded his shirt in half, looming over her while unbuckling his belt. Their eyes never left each other. She took deep breaths as she lifted her tank top over her head.

  There they are, my beautiful works of art.

  His phone began to ring.

  She motioned for him to answer it. “It’s okay,” she mouthed silently.

  Irritated, he pulled it out of his pocket. “Two seconds,” he whispered, leaning back on his feet to keep his balance on the bed.

  “Yes!” he barked. “No, man, I’m not there yet. I’m still in London. I won’t be landing until late Sunday evening.”

  He wondered whether cell phones announced your location to every caller. He still wasn’t the savviest person when it came to technology. He cut the call abruptly; he couldn’t take it anymore. He had to be inside her.

  And as he looked up from his phone, he saw her. Turned on her side, her legs tucked under knees, her chest rising and falling in slow motion; Tessa was fast asleep.

  “Simon, please,” Tessa gasped, almost out of air and struggling to hold herself up as she leaned on the marble counter top. “I want you.”

  When Simon announced he wanted to have breakfast, she’d had no idea his first meal of the day would be her. He had already taken her once that morning, vowing to make her pay for falling asleep on him the night before.

  “Not yet, baby,” h
e muttered, his lips against her skin. “I’m still hungry.”

  “But,” she said, bending down to grab his head and pulling it up toward her. “I’m going, and I want you to be here with me. Please.”

  He shot upward, laid her on the counter and plunged hard and deep inside her. She held on to his shoulders, spurring him on, teasing him. “More.” She breathed. “More.”

  “Tess,” he groaned. “Take me, baby.” He pumped faster, harder, lifting her legs and resting them on his shoulders. It wasn’t long before he released, shuddering and shaking as he collapsed on top of her. Gently, he placed her legs down and held her up against him, supporting her with his arms. They kissed passionately, languidly, as if they were lovers who hadn’t seen each other in a long while.

  Tessa broke the kiss, caressing his face and wiping the sweat off his brow. “Now I’m going to make you a real breakfast.”

  “Okay, it says here,” she said, tracing the map they’d picked up before boarding the Star Ferry, “that the shops are walking distance from where we get off.”

  “I thought you wanted to go to Ocean Park.”

  “I did, but with tonight’s gala event, we don’t have that much time,” she answered. “I figured we could walk around Kowloon a bit, see Mong Kok or the Langham Mall before heading back.”

  She saw his blank expression.

  “Sorry. Says here the Langham is a huge mall with lots of stores and places to eat. And Mong Kok is their outdoor bargain market. Sort of like New York’s Times Square, only many more stalls.”

  His face still registered no reaction. She finally realized his expression had nothing to do with the shopping. She was obligated to take Andrew as her date to the gala event tonight, which meant spending a few hours without Simon.

  This was clear, she told herself. I mentioned this to him even before he offered to meet me here.

  Maybe she was reading too much into it. They were friends. Okay, maybe lovers. But with a common understanding. And obligations.

  “No biggie,” he responded as he took her hand and led her to one of the benches by the window. “I’ve got so much work to do; I should get started on my work plan while you’re out.”

  “That’s more than I can say I’ve done,” she said. “I still have no clue about the arc of my new book. Zero. Zilch. Nada.”

  “Why is that?” he asked.

  “I don’t know. I’m just not forming anything coherent these days. It takes a while for the characters to find their voice.”

  “And how does that come about?”

  She placed his hand on her lap, held it there and looked out at the harbor. “It just means I still haven’t found the pivotal scene. It will come.”

  “Have you ever thought about writing an outline?”

  “Me?” She laughed. “No way.”

  The ferry moved seamlessly across the water, bellowing its horn at passengers on a nearby yacht. Simon turned to get a better view of the skyline. He relaxed the full weight of his body against the wall and pulled her close. He looked mesmerized by the scenery, the buildings in all their majesty only to be upstaged by the mountains directly behind them. It was August, a summer month when the weather was hot and humid, and the forests were lush and verdant.

  “Simon?” She squeezed his hand to get his attention.

  “Hmm?” he answered, still staring off to the side.

  “This is the third place we’ve visited together.” She had no idea why she’d said that. She didn’t want to sound mushy, but the calmness in the air left her feeling bold. Made her believe she could speak her mind with him. She was glad the third date rule had failed to rear its ugly head.

  He pulled her to him and she settled her head on his shoulder. “I know,” he answered with a smile she felt against her hair. “Is that your one truth?”

  “Yeah,” she declared, pulling his hand into her lap. “Yeah. It is. What’s yours?”

  “You smell really good.”

  After a two hour wait and with three shopping bags in tow, they commandeered a table for four at a dim sum restaurant in Mong Kok called Tim Ho Wan. It was a recommendation from a friend of Simon’s who had spent a few years in Hong Kong when he first joined the company.

  It shocked her that all she bought was a blouse for Riley and a wallet for Jacob. Simon had done most of the shopping, picking up a pair of shoes at Burberry and ordering a custom-made silk suit. Watching the ladies at the suit place fuss over him like he was someone famous amused her. She overheard one of the women telling the security guard by the door that he was a British actor.

  She didn’t blame them one bit. When he stepped out of the fitting room for the tailor to mark his alterations, she heard them giggle.

  All the while, he kept his eyes on her, asking for her advice regarding the fit of the jacket and her choice of color.

  She hardly looked like someone who should be stepping out with a famous actor, but she didn’t care. Her hair was a bit grown out, and her jeans had way too many holes in them. This was her down time, her time with Simon, she reasoned to herself. Every time she was in the public eye, things always had to be in place. When she wasn’t seeing people, she reveled in wearing what was now called street fashion. Loose, chic but comfortable.

  “Pretty packed for a hole in the wall,” Simon said, while digging his chopsticks into a basket of siu mai. He had taken care of the ordering, which pleased her to no end. She loved it when he took charge. Steamed baskets of assorted food filled the table—pork filled bao, chicken feet, shrimp dumplings, radish cake and pineapple buns. She tried everything except one.

  “Those,” she lightly touched his lips, “are definitely going nowhere near these,” she pointed to her mouth, “after those,” she looked at the chicken feet.

  Simon leaned back in his chair and laughed. “I don’t blame you.”

  She leaned back too, this time with her arms crossed. Just as she was about to ask whether anyone in Simon’s family had ever been to Hong Kong, a thought suddenly entered her mind. “Who knows you’re here?”

  “You mean, specifically here? In Hong Kong?”

  She nodded.

  “No one. My family and friends think I’m traveling for work.”

  “Ah. So, if anything happened to you, how do they know where to look?” she asked, resting her chin on the palm of her hand.

  “Well, when they find my phone and the one thousand pictures of you, they’ll know,” he said.

  She laughed. Rather uncomfortably. This is what having an affair feels like. It’s you and him and no one else.

  “Adrian doesn’t know I’m here.” This time he leaned forward, closer to her. “Does Riley know you’re here?”

  “She has to. Even if I don’t tell her directly, Jake knows. He’s very protective that way. Needs to know where I go, who I’m with.”

  “You seem so attached, the two of you.”

  “He’s the only constant in my life.”

  He stayed silent. She hadn’t intended to offend him. But then she decided it was too soon to even think of his role in her life.

  That was the real crux of the matter, and she wanted to keep it top of mind.

  “What about you, your parents? Do you see them often while you’re home?”

  He laughed. “As a matter of fact, I have dinner with them every Sunday. They don’t live far from my old apartment. I’m moving to Chelsea when I get back, which is a little further away, but I know my mum will find every excuse to come and visit. I’ll be too close to the shopping area for her to resist. She likes to get out sometimes. Leave the farm.”

  “We’re lucky we have family we can count on,” she said.

  “But none of them know we’re together,” he said, his tone lowered, quiet.

  “Why does anyone need to know? Who cares?” she asked in defiance.

  He picked up another dumpling and shoved the whole thing in his mouth.

  “Okay, let me rephra
se that,” she said. “In time, they’ll know.”

  He smiled. “Better.”

  He looked at his watch. She could tell he wanted to change the subject. And she didn’t have to try. A round of applause filled the room. Tessa and Simon turned to see a man on one knee with his arms in the air, proposing to a very embarrassed woman.

  “At a dim sum restaurant?” Simon smirked.

  “Hey! You’ll never know! Maybe this is a special place for them,” Tessa said.

  “Must be,” he answered, pulling his wallet out. He motioned for the dim sum man to bring the check over.

  The man counted the different colored plates, each with a code for the food they ordered, wrote with lightning speed on a pad of paper, tore it off unevenly and handed it to Simon.

  As he examined the bill, Simon said, “I forgot your Twitter profile says, ‘hopeless romantic.’”

  “Love makes the world go ‘round!” she said in response, pausing to follow up with an afterthought. “At least in romance books!”

  Simon abhorred spending this much time in front of the mirror. Normally. But tonight, he wanted everything to look perfect. He twisted his bowtie until it looked just right. It bothered him, not having a good set of cufflinks—who would’ve known he’d be attending a formal event while in Hong Kong? The event was being held to honor the Prime Minister of Canada during his visit to Hong Kong. Tessa had been invited as part of the Artist’s delegation. Simon had not been invited, but a colleague named Nancy Ling had friends who knew the organizers.

  He was an easygoing guy, never really one to care about what he wore, always believed comfort and fit came first before designers or brand names. But if anything came between him, his watches and his cufflinks, that would be another story. A man’s image was reflected by his personal taste in those two items. That night, he had the watch, but not the cufflinks.

  Renting a tux two-hours before an event was a production in itself. First, he had to leave the suite while Tessa was getting dressed to make a few phone calls. One call to the Asia Society for last minute seats to the event, and then another call to Nancy Ling, who had offered him tickets if he would go as her date. She even told him she’d meet him there, despite his offer to swing by her apartment on his way to the party.